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Cat's Logs - Week 2

Just so you understand what itz like around here, here's some background.

Mz Veldt has her own floor; guess she's scared of me. At my 20 pounds (and no fat!) to her 8, she's no match for me. So this morning, Mz Veldt insisted on coming downstairs even tho I was sleeping on the couch next to the 'puter.

Boy! Was she surprised to see me. We both played it kool. I sat on the couch and watched her. She pretended to check out the puter cords. She checked out the closet, jumped up on the couch behind GlennaJo, climbed on the mousepad and generally made a pest of herself.

Then she calmly walked from the room toward the door to her floor.

Keeping GlennaJo busy writing this account at my dictation, I leaped from the couch and gave chase. I got her cornered, but GlennaJo interfered before any real fun started.

At least GlennaJo ended up on the couch by herself--which is what such a spoil sport deserves.

GlennaJo was home again today. Something about Martin Luther King holiday and equal rights for everybody she says.

I told her I won't believe in equal rights until I get to eat at the table with her. She said I could start as soon as I get a job and start helping with the bills. So we stared at each other until I became bored and went to sleep.

Anyway, GlennaJo was doing laundry in the basement, which is a very very interesting place, I'm sure. Access to the basement is another of those rights I'm short on. But GlennaJo left a little bit of a crack in the door and I was able to open it and go down a couple of steps. What a dirty place. Full of spiders (yum!) [ick!] and other stuff. GlennaJo saw the open door, but didn't see me in the shadows of the step and she just freaked out!!! "Prince!! Prince!!" I continued my explorations until she saw me on the step, pushed me out the door, and closed it tight. I wasn't doing anything!!

If GlennaJo's afraid I'll touch a spider, she should see what I'm stalking in the kitchen. It's got 8 legs. It's big and tan. It crawls all over . . . [enough!]

I thought GlennaJo would never go off to work!

For three days I've had to be on my very best behavior every minute. Today, we did things my way. I checked out the recycling bags, climbed on the kitchen table to check out what's there, sat in both the comfy windows and watched the birds, checked out the traffic in front of the house and . . . (yawn, snore).

When GlennaJo finally got home, I was mostly awake and needed to stretch myself, so I walked up to the door. She started telling me what a "sweet kitty" I am. Since when is 20 lbs. of solid tom cat sweet? If she didn't feed me such good stuff, I'd show her! It'd serve her right if I didn't purr when she scratches my neck [it's instinct] (it's patience).

I'm avoiding sitting on the couch next to GlennaJo because she keeps brushing me. She says she loves me, but hates the mats because they're bad for me. Still, it could be worse. When I first came to live with GlennaJo, my sides had mats that looked like continents. [The vet said I could brush them out, and theoretically I could, but] (It really hurt! I started running every time GlennaJo came near me) To save our friendship, GlennaJo had me shaved, but only on the really matted parts. [You looked like puss in boots with your back half shaved and your front half all hairy - either that or a poodl] (Hey! This is my diary, and I definitely did not look one bit canine!) [At least you were nice and cool that summer.] (Do you know what it's like to sit on the floor with your bare skin . . . oh, I guess you do.)

Tomorrow has got to be a more exciting day.

GlennaJo came home today all in a rush.

I gave her my best greeting, but all she did was pat my head and sit down at the 'puter. Seems a client had a rush order that she had to take care of right away. Tonight her idea of quality time was me sleeping next to her, so I stayed in the living room and played with my Christmas cat toy to pass the time.

Finally I had settled down on the couch for my nap when GlennaJo scooped me up and set me back in the livingroom so "princess" Veldt could sit on the couch where she feels safe! This is so unfair. I'm willing to play with her--I'll even let her pick the game and the place--I gladly follow her whereever she goes . . . [hahum, I think listening to her when she says she doesn't want to play would go a long way . . .] (what do you know about play--all you ever do is sit at that 'puter) [OK, how about if my fingers follow you everywhere you go - tickle tickle - tickle tickle - tickle . . . ] (that's different) [right!]

Anyway, Ms. Veldt stayed for about 10 minutes and then went back upstairs. So GlennaJo picks me up and puts me back on the couch. And adds insult to injury by telling me I'm sweet.

One of these days . . .

Thursday, January 21, 1999

[So, Prince, what did you do today?] (I'm not telling. You don't care. You left before 8 and got home after 10. If you cared what I do, you'd be home to help me do it.)

[How'm I supposed to type your diary if you don't tell me what you do?] (I thought you said it was a kronkle.) [OK, I need your input to type your "kronkle." Were you good today or bad?] (Can't you tell?) [Well, there's no obvious damage, so either you slept all day or you're pretty subtle.] (Don't I look subtle?) [Not in the least. I'll make something up.]

I slept all day, waking only briefly to eat and sleep. I made token trips to the two comfortable windows and considered jumping on the kitchen table, but mostly I slept. When GlennaJo got home, I got up and walked to the door to greet her. But, like usual, it was Mz. Veldt who got to sit on the couch by the 'puter next to GlennaJo.

(That's it?) [Based on the evidence, yes.] (But I'm a wild and crazy guy.) [Oh, r e a l l y. Prove it. No, wait, don't, DON'T.] [I liked that lamp.]

I was on the basement steps! Nah na na na Nah na. I was on the basement steps!

I really got GlennaJo going this morning. You would have thought I tore up her favorite toy. What a crab. And she doesn't drink coffee, so she never gets over it.

Today she comes home at the normal time, and acts like that's a major accomplishment. I walked to greet her at the door and she said today there's nothing more important than me. I knew that, but it's nice to see she finally recognizes it. She fed me turkey treats and told me I'm a really good cat (better than calling me "sweet"--gag). So I rewarded her by resting on the carpet in the middle of the living room and ignoring her suggestion that I sit near her on the couch. You can't let your human think you need or even like them.

If you give them an inch they take a mile. Guaranteed.

GlennaJo was snoring until well past ten this morning. Then, after a perfunctory hug, she was glued to the 'puter.

So I played with the feather toy that's attached to the dresser for awhile and then settled down for a nap. Fat chance. GlennaJo kept making the phone ring while speaking nonsense into the this little plastic thing attached to the 'puter. [I was recording greetings for our new voice message system.] (You always have an excuse for your irrational behavior, but I know the truth.)

After an hour or so of that water torture, she ran to the basement, but returned too soon for me to make my entrance. Then she took off for several hours, leaving me to my own devices. I spent most of my time on the shelf next to the kitchen window. It's a distinctly urban view with alley, parking lot and some stores, but there is an occasional bird or child to check out. GlennaJo loves this neighborhood, but its charm is lost on me.

I'd rather be in the country watching squirrels and chipmunks.

Chats
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Squirt
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